Man, I just don't know. Why did I allow myself to get so close? Like really...I see the end...I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Three whole years...mostly wasted. Why has it taken me so long? Was I really burnt out or was that some lameshit excuse? I think it was bullshit. Maybe I did need time to sort things out. But fuck...three long fucking years!
I always "learn my lesson" but never does it stay in my head...the stress and insanity I put myself through...I always forget it. I never remember to learn my lesson. Now if I pull through once again...will I have learned? I don't want to even think if I don't pull through. Then life will just be shit. I will have let down the people I love and myself, duh. Does all this rambling do me any good? I don't even know if me writing this will have any bearing on whether or not I remember...or learn my lesson...or just stop being a spoiled lazy piece of shit.
Oh whatever I do things my way.
There I go again with the humor. It's so not the time.
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